Man, This weather!
This weather makes for me operating at my Peak. Fall is my favorite season, and it felt like fall this morning as I drove in. It made me nostalgic. And hungry for Donuts. The problem is, finding a decent place for donuts is like finding a Ponderosa Steakhouse.
The reason? owners that don't give a crap what they serve you. I can't tell you how often I've had Dunkin' Donuts that have looked old when I got them and tasted worse. I have a feeling that people that come from the third world to open their cash-based business have a vastly different standard of "Freshness" because in the back of their mind, they can't fathom throwing away that paperweight-worthy chocolate cake donut. That same donut would feed an entire family in the village they came from. Is that an indictment of America as much as it is an indictment of freshness? Maybe. Probably. But if you're charging me $0.79 per donut, I have the right to expect it to meet my gruelling freshness standards. Gone are the days when Dad would bring a dozen home, and they were all great even three days later. Gone are the days of Mister Donut competing with Dunkin Donuts.
Now are the days of the crapshoot, where the only quality donut chain is so in love with itself that you can barely walk out of there without spending $10 and being up to your balls in assholes calmoring for a hot-off-the-conveyor freebie. Of course, I'm talkin' about Krispy Kreme. I am a fan from back when they didn't sell 'em North of the Mason-Dixon line. And if you've only experienced them when a coworker brings them in, or a gas station or some other such place has a display case, then you're cheating yourself. There's nothing like that hot one fresh off the conveyor...
But I Digress from my crusade against Dunkin Donuts. I have but one thing to add. They opened one of them Combo Dunkin Donuts/Baskin Robbins in my town. Not only did I go there and have the guy apologetically mark down the dozen he sold me, knowing it was going to be stale, but I had another guy scoop me a cone of Pistachio on a chewy-stale plain cone. I was moved to call the 800-number then, and all they offered to do was forward my complaint on. They wanted to know if I wanted my name and number passed on to the owners of the franchise location that had wronged me as if my complaint via an 800-number would outweigh my complaints in person.
It makes me nostalgic for real customer service.
The reason? owners that don't give a crap what they serve you. I can't tell you how often I've had Dunkin' Donuts that have looked old when I got them and tasted worse. I have a feeling that people that come from the third world to open their cash-based business have a vastly different standard of "Freshness" because in the back of their mind, they can't fathom throwing away that paperweight-worthy chocolate cake donut. That same donut would feed an entire family in the village they came from. Is that an indictment of America as much as it is an indictment of freshness? Maybe. Probably. But if you're charging me $0.79 per donut, I have the right to expect it to meet my gruelling freshness standards. Gone are the days when Dad would bring a dozen home, and they were all great even three days later. Gone are the days of Mister Donut competing with Dunkin Donuts.
Now are the days of the crapshoot, where the only quality donut chain is so in love with itself that you can barely walk out of there without spending $10 and being up to your balls in assholes calmoring for a hot-off-the-conveyor freebie. Of course, I'm talkin' about Krispy Kreme. I am a fan from back when they didn't sell 'em North of the Mason-Dixon line. And if you've only experienced them when a coworker brings them in, or a gas station or some other such place has a display case, then you're cheating yourself. There's nothing like that hot one fresh off the conveyor...
But I Digress from my crusade against Dunkin Donuts. I have but one thing to add. They opened one of them Combo Dunkin Donuts/Baskin Robbins in my town. Not only did I go there and have the guy apologetically mark down the dozen he sold me, knowing it was going to be stale, but I had another guy scoop me a cone of Pistachio on a chewy-stale plain cone. I was moved to call the 800-number then, and all they offered to do was forward my complaint on. They wanted to know if I wanted my name and number passed on to the owners of the franchise location that had wronged me as if my complaint via an 800-number would outweigh my complaints in person.
It makes me nostalgic for real customer service.
posted by Zach at 2:08 PM
3 Comments:
aw, zach. fall rules. i love your blog. i love that you take action across the board in several displeased consumer departments.
i also love that you are a 72 year old man in a 30 year old's b.
Thanks?
only a complo, friend. you are charming.
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