You gots ta pay ta play!

I got enraged listening to the radio this morning. Not much has enraged me about this Blagojevich thing... I mean I was not surprised by any of this. Especially being a Chicagoan and knowing what goes on from people that work for and do business with the city. The most enraging thin is that I do a really good Blagojevich impression, and now I'll have no place or reason to do it. Maybe he'll knock over a 7-11...
Anyway, they were talking about the new governor, Pat Quinn. They played a sound bite from some Illinois representative who said something like this:
"That Pat Quinn's gonna have to change his reputation as a reformer and do-gooder. He's got to realize that in in Illinois you have to grease the wheels to get things done."
Seriously. After all this "Pay for Play" shit and this subhuman said some crap like this? I'm listening to the radio trying to hear the quote again so I can hear who said it.
How dumb can you be? Dumb enough to know you're under investigation and talk openly about selling a senate seat? Maybe...

Somebody gets paid to do that.

So, when you have kids, you get exposed to a lot of dreck. Some stuff is good. Sesame Street, of course, but even some of the new stuff like Backyardigans won't make you want to throw the TV out the window. Miette always wants this Strawberry Shortcake CD from the library. It's a bunch of songs written for the strawberry shortcake gang. (They still air her cartoons, but they're not cartoons anymore, they're computer-generated.)
Anyway, someone got paid to write, compose, and perform all the music on this saccharine, nonsensical CD. Worse yet, someone likely AUDITIONED to sing as strawberry shortcake on the CD. I picture a line of young women in Hollywood filing past the CD's producers and singing some Brooke Hogan tune for their audition. Then I picture some asshole with a pony tail saying, "We'll let you know."
Whenever there's some abysmally insipid thing on TV, I turn to my wife and imitate the character and say, "Guys! I got a part on this new TV show!".
Case in point, almost anything aired on the Disney channel, particularly Imagination Movers and Johnny and the Sprites. No offense to Tracy Ellert who plays Dancy Nancy on Bunnytown.
Fortunately, Miette's been real into old Tom & Jerry cartoons of late.
Unfortunately, she loves John & Kate plus 8. If you are unfamiliar, it's a show on TLC (I think) that follows a couple, and their twins and sextuplets. Miette's fascinated because the sextuplets are her age. However, it really couldn't be less interesting. Plus, that Kate's a real whiner, and they both stink of bornagain brainwash. John & Kate must get paid real well by the channel that brought you The Midget Family and Half Ton Dad. They're getting a massive new house. Maybe I should have 8 more kids or gain 800 pounds so people would pay me to watch "How I Do It".
The answer: Well.

If 2 don't rock her, order a...

So, we went down to the in-laws after christmas 'til NYE. I really wish I had brough something to read, as beyond Walmart and the Rural King, there isn't much to do in Charleson, IL. However, it is a college town, so we had one good drinkin' night. We went to an Alcoholic's bar, the Uptowner, I think, where the special was $2 UV vodka drinks and $1 Miller lites. I'm here to tell you that if you're ever out of Robitussin, UV Cherry and Red Bull tastes EXACTLY the same. FUGH. So, after a couple dollar beers, we went to the hard-on bar where my wife and her sister and their friend were more likely to have the unwelcome encounter with HS classmates. The bar used to be called Stix as in pool cues, or more accurately, "Fuck Stix". It's now called the Panther Paw, which reminds me of the Peach Pit.
Anyway, their signature beer is called THE SHOCKER! We excitedly ordered a pitcher (for $6)...
and as soon as it touched our lips we felt like barfing. Good God, if you were trying to teach someone a lesson about the perils of beer drinking, take them out for a Shocker. What untold horrors would a Shocker Hangover hold?
Well, at least it's Aptly named...